The house is in ruins

dog hairs cover everything

sticky sweat

haven’t cooked a proper meal in days

lists of things to do hanging on cigarette smoke

I finally remembered what love feels like

not entirely sure I can grasp all aspects

have been trying for days now

initially came those intense dreams

realistic and disturbing

then came oblivion and denial

then came some sympathy for oneself and existence

not feeling very scientific

feeling entirely practical

entirely emotional

a practically emotional state of affairs

and the realisation that one can’t but love what it is they love

can’t help but protect what it is they need to keep alive

people’s faces are melting

I’m reviewing summer photos

now always seems so far away

tomorrow is a long way

personal symbolism

personal objects and shared memories of enormous significance

wasted time

feeling for one another

the war is upon us

or is it the peace?

making peace with war

the war inside

the social war

the family war

the building war

the family pet war

the peace of a forest to live in and a warm body to live by

the ugly  and the beautiful

all merged together in midst

the new and the old

the beauty and the beast

the nightmare and the sweet dream

the violent awakening in the middle of the night

not knowing if that dream was a nightmare

because you care too much to make a personal descision

a shared existence

is always a heavy affair

an enormous risk

smelling of doom

sweet doom like the birth of a child

destined to die

destined to live

destined to feel pain

destined to change every cell in our bodies

think more, not less


sweet dreams

How we love to pull strings

it’s called lust

yet we do it to the very people we love the most

middle class games of adolescent minds

just turned 34 and adolescence doesn’t look like it will end any time soon

nothing to loose and yet everything on the table

all you can really trust happened up to the point you turned three

Maybe sometimes it’s ok to say sweet dreams

generalisations are just an emotional diversion

we don’t pray hard enough for humanity

faith is so last millenium

metamodernism infected with perverted notions of eroticism

in our clothes and hair

strip naked

and stop your mind from inhibiting your life

no, not your mind, stop the movies, stop the books, stop the scientific references

don’t pull the trigger

just say sweet dreams and focus on what life smells like

it’s the only way you can momentarily own it

time is just around the corner

pointing it’s arrow ahead

but scattered all through space

everywhere you look there are dimensions of time

with self-consciousness comes the ability to manipulate time

but never forget that the arrow will mercilessly point ahead

never forget that the sweat dripping from your forehead

is your whole life piled up in your body

and it’s already more words than my brain can process